Those four little words

I've waited a year to say four words that I got to say Tuesday: "I got the job."

Overall, I've really enjoyed my job at The Enquirer-Journal, but I've been restless the past several months. I've been there for more than three and a half years, but have little to show for it. I have more responsibilities, I've gotten my master's and I think I'm a better writer, but no one to my knowledge has received a raise. Plus, health insurance went up, so I'm actually getting paid LESS than when I started. We also have one less reporter and one less editor than when I started, so as the "senior reporter," a lot of the extras fall on me -- typing in religion news, making sure all social news (wedding and birthday announcements, etc.) is in and editing endless briefs. It's not hard stuff, but it's time consuming.

More importantly, I feel like I rarely get to use my seminary degree. When people ask what I want to do with it, I tell them my education was good for personal growth and that I hope to write more about religion. I've been saying the same thing since I graduated in December 2009 and the words don't come out easily. I'm fulfilled when sharing my faith and feel like I could be making a lasting difference, but I have so few occasions to actually do that through my writing with so many other things vying for my time at work.

In the past year, I've pursued four jobs that didn't pan out. Then right at a month ago, a woman from SES (my seminary) emailed me about a job opening: an Internet writer/editor position with the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association. I was excited about the job description but didn't know if it was another dead end. I applied for a job with BGEA back in February and received the nicest rejection letter I think I've ever read, complete with a Bible verse. I figured if I didn't get a job with them then, I probably wouldn't now, but I had to try. The job sounded so exciting. ... In fact, just last night, I looked back at my email to see what exactly the name of the job was that I applied for the first time. I knew the job description was at least similar, but I couldn't remember the exact name. When I found my old emails, I realized that it was the same job I just got! I applied for the same job twice but with two very different outcomes.

It's funny how there have been so many miracles along the way. When the woman from SES told me about the job, I applied that night, then expected a long wait. I got an email within the week, asking when I would be available to meet with them. Everything since then has been such a blessing. I've met some wonderful people and really look forward to working with them and in a new environment. The commute is longer, but I think it'll be worth it. The main person I interviewed with said they had interviewed several qualified candidates but just hadn't found the right person. I thought, "Oh no, what if I'm not the right person?" I knew I would be disappointed, but kept praying that if this is where I'm meant to be, it will work out. I met with more people the following week.

After I got the job, the interviewer told me that the day after we met the first time, he was in a business meeting where there was talk of freezing all the open positions. One guy brought up the position I applied for and said they should still fill that one.

I've also been thinking to myself that God would probably let me get below X amount in my checking account before presenting a new job opportunity. I don't know why I kept thinking about that number, but I wouldn't put it past Him to let me get in a somewhat uncomfortable place to show me who's boss. I just paid the mortgage and sure enough, I'm in that zone. I still have my savings account, but I'm trying not to touch that. At least I won't have to keep watching my account shrink for much longer. :)

If I'd gotten the job with BGEA several months ago when they first posted it, I wouldn't have participated in some great newsroom projects at work and I wouldn't have pursued the web editor job with WORLD Magazine. (I got to the top three!) WORLD plans to publish a story I wrote for them, and I might have a foot in the door for future freelance opportunities. ...

So those four little words -- "I got the job" -- have now turned into those three little words that I've known all along but now appreciate even more: God is good.

The lunchbox duo

I occasionally pack Pete's lunch at the same time I pack mine. Poor thing gets a lot of "girly" foods: a fiber bar, wheat thins and gouda, pineapple pieces or strawberry yogurt with a pink ribbon on the lid for breast cancer awareness. I packed him beef jerky once so the guys at work wouldn't make fun of him. :)

The sky is falling!

I'm surprised that I haven't been hit in the head with an acorn yet. Every time I walk outside, more nuts fall out of the sky, pelting the deck and backyard with loud THUMPS. Sometimes they hit the door or a window. When it first happened, I thought someone was trying to break in. Zoey is having a ball chewing them and spitting them out.

Sitting pretty

Zoey does this funny thing when she sits on the kitchen floor. Her legs slowly slide back as she sits there and she has to readjust. ... I also let her ride in the front seat today (sans seat belt). She's a whopping 18.3 pounds now!

I also need to catch up on our weekend Oct. 8-9. Pete and I and several other family members surprised Mom for her 50th birthday with a dinner at The Peppermill in Abingdon, Va., and a funny show at Barter Theatre. She doesn't look 50. :) We went hiking the next day at Bays Mountain.

Man vs. woman

Here's an interesting paper about gender roles that a woman from SES wrote a couple of years ago. It's been sitting in my email for a while and I just got around to reading it.

Download paper

Zoey

We got Zoey on Sept. 9 after looking at several adoptable dogs online. No dog will replace Coal, and I felt kind of guilty even thinking about another dog, but we wanted to give another pet a good home. We got Zoey from a shelter in Lincolnton. She seems to be a fast learner and pretty smart. She started closing her eyes when I put my hand up to wop her on the nose for doing something bad. She stays out of the trash (unlike Coal) but likes shoes and feet and pulled my underwear out of the laundry basket yesterday. We have to work on her jumping and she's learning to go down stairs the proper way instead of jumping from the top and landing front paws out. She doesn't whimper nearly as much as when we first got her and put her in a crate when we went to bed. I'm not sure I would say she's totally housetrained, but she's definitely getting there. It does drive me crazy that she won't walk in a straight line when she's on a leash. She goes in zigzags like a drunk driver. She's not afraid of the neighbor dogs, either, but doesn't bark at them. Actually, I don't think I've heard her bark yet. I tell her "no" a lot, but I love her to pieces. ... She does look a little like Coal.

Remembering 9-11

I was a sophomore in high school when hijackers crashed two planes into the Twin Towers, left a gaping hole in the Pentagon and tried to take over a fourth plane that landed in a Pennsylvania field. My health class sat glued to the TV and suddenly, our assignments weren't so important.

In the past week, I've watched horrifying video footage from that day and read personal accounts of witnesses and emergency responders. It's all coming back. Saturday, I read an article about heightened security in New York and Washington, D.C., and I admit I'm nervous to see if anything happens Sunday. At the same time, I'm struck by New Yorkers going about their daily lives, almost ignoring armed officers lining subway stations and guarding government buildings. I love that they won't let fear get the best of them, that they are living proof of Americans standing strong.

I dug out my old diary from Sept. 11, 2001, and the days following. I had forgotten so much of my initial response. Here's what I wrote.

Sept. 11

"At about 10 'til 10 this morning, our principal came on the announcements and said for all of the teachers to turn their TVs on. She said something terrible was going on. ... The words 'America Under Attack' shocked me when I saw them on the bottom of the screen. I never really thought about OUR country being under attack. We're America. We're free. ... The first of the Twin Towers was on fire and billowed thick, dark clouds of smoke from its top. Then, while I was sitting in health class watching the screen, a second plane crashed through the second of the Twin Towers. The announcer lady who was reporting at that time started yelling ... and screaming. ...

"There was a third explosion, not from a plane, but from the first of the buildings collapsing. Then there was the second building. It was as if someone had pulled the ground out from under it. The whole thing just fell like enormous Jenga pieces. ...

"One girl in my class was crying, a couple of other people I know had family there ... and Mr. Cunningham looked so depressed . ... There was an administrator in our class while we were watching all of this and his mouth just gaped at the TV. ...

"When I got to Spanish, Ms. Contreras had the TV on even though we weren't supposed to by then. The principal came back on the intercom and said ... everything's under control, we're on top of things, and as long as we have a good education everything will be fine. 'Is she seeing this?!' I blurted out to Alex. ...

"The Pentagon had also been attacked ... and had a huge slice in one side. ... President Bush had been in Sarasota, Florida. ... To make his speech to the nation, he was flown to Washington, D.C. ... He said people could tear down the foundation of our biggest buildings, but they couldn't shake the foundation of our strong country. ... Then he quoted Psalm 23: 'Ye though I walk through the shadow of death, I fear no evil, for Thou art with me.' ..."

Sept. 12

"It's the day after and the world is still in chaos. Every TV and radio station you turn to, all you hear is breaking news. They say America hasn't been this in danger since 60 years ago with Pearl Harbor. I bet they'll make a movie about this someday. ...

"It seems like a horror movie coming to life. You always associate terrorists with problem countries far away from here. ... All planes were grounded yesterday. Only a few of our military planes and ones carrying blood are allowed to fly now. It's just hard to believe all of this happened so fast. Yesterday morning was so normal. ...

"Sarah's dad is in Boston right now for work. ... He said he thinks he knew people on the two planes from Boston that were hijacked. ... I couldn't even imagine knowing you were going to die in a matter of minutes and not being able to do much about it. On the radio this morning, they were saying the hijackers were taking passengers and flight attendants to the back of the plane and stabbing them with knives and box openers. One man called his wife on his cell and said everyone was going to die, but three of the passengers were going to try to take over the plane from the hijackers. Then he told her he loved her. Once the passengers got control of the plane, they didn't know how to operate it and crashed. ... The man had three kids.

"There was even a picture in the paper and on the news of Palestinian kids and adults waving their flags and celebrating. It made me sick. ... Osama bin Laden is being blamed for a lot of this. ... They were saying on the news that the FBI and CIA had gotten warnings as soon as Sept. 8 that something awful would happen. But how do you react? You can't stop the world. You have no idea what's going to happen. Or where. ...

"They also had a moment of silence in the U.S. ... Radio stations were quiet. I was in the car going home from school and me, Mom, and Sara were quiet. Everyone's flying their flags at half mast. ...

"My main question right now is why is God doing this. But I know he has a reason. Whether to bring our country together, or begin an international war, I have faith in Him. He ALWAYS pulls us through. ...

"I was watching a man on TV tonight saying he thought we were on the verge of a huge war. Mom told me a few months ago she wouldn't be surprised if WWII happened during my lifetime. ..."

Sept. 13

"Building five of the WTC collapsed this morning. It had been twisting and breaking windows since at least yesterday. ...

"Dad's building, the Bank of America building, and other federal buildings downtown (Charlotte) were evacuated Tuesday. Dad was working from home. They were also evacuating the building across from him yesterday when he was going home. ..."

Sept. 18

"It's been a week now and I think people are beginning to bounce back. ... Mr. Wessler, my World History teacher, said this would be THE event of the year, decade, and even half century.

"I was watching TRL today. ... There were a few people standing outside the studio again. (Including some firemen.) ... They played the videos people had requested to make them feel better, or help them through this situation. ...

"President Bush has ordered, I think, about 35,000 people for war. It's not a war against a country, but one against terrorism. ... I think, and hope, we'll win."

Oct. 7

"We started bombing the Taliban today. ... I was watching the news some today and the 'America Under Attack' from 2 weeks ago was gone. In its place was 'America Strikes Back.'

"I was in the office typing up a book review for World History today when I heard a loud plane outside. I was the only one home and I really got scared. ... I could already see the window behind me breaking and smoke filling the neighborhood. ... The plane eventually passed.

"We started bombing today about 12:30. ... I really feel bad if any innocent people are dying. They don't deserve to die! I wouldn't like to die for something I had no control over — or even something I was against.

"They were also showing N.Y. on TV. The WTC towers are STILL on fire from little flames from the glass. Then they showed N.Y. from the N.J. coast. Desolated. Empty. Dark. NO lights. ... There are precautions, warnings, and heightened security EVERYwhere in the U.S. right now.

Another plane."